Fiona's

為什麼結束一段關係時，總會有悲傷的感覺？
隔了好一陣子，那天終於撥空到書店走走。記得在許多年前，一個人住在台北時，一有空總是喜歡窩在這家書店，找一個角落看上好幾個小時的書。也許是我很喜歡店內深色調的裝潢，又或著是店內附設咖啡廳裡的咖啡香吸引著我，當時一個人閱讀的時光，那種悠閒的感受到現在還是那麼的鮮明。

最近我一直在想著對於自己的現況，那種莫名的依賴感究竟是習慣還是喜愛？身邊由好多人所組成的人生，每個片段我總是會對之產生無法割捨的情感。
所以，當這人生中的某一個人因為某種原因而必須離開時，那隨之而來的悲傷並不會隨著時間的流逝變模糊，我善於記憶過往的個性只會讓它更加清晰。

在那個重新踏進那家書店的下午，妳用幾年所紀錄的故事在一本暢銷書的簡介中又重回我空白了好久的記憶。
一切都好像只是昨天才發生的事，那字句之中所傳達的情感，赤裸裸的悲哀。如果一段關係走到進退維谷的瓶頸，離開或是留下，那種不知所措的為難我想是比灑脫離去後的空虛還要令人難受吧。

可以被預知的分離和突然而來的結束，在面對困難時，至少我們都曾試著讓理性不被感覺所左右，就算悲傷是必然的。
捨得是那麼的難，但若是放開手中反覆拉扯的依戀能為自己帶來美麗的藍天，那麼就放下吧。

Giving up is the hardest part
Since you’ve given all your heart

The day I heard this song
The night I read your story

I’ve fallen
For the teardrops on your guitar
If he’ll stay for good
All the words untold will
Become the melody echoing deep inside

When you dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part

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Dreaming With a Broken Heart (John Mayer)
http://tw.youtube.com/watch?v=xj-WOygAXWQ

When you’re dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part

You roll out of bed and down on your knees
and for a moment you can hardly breathe
Wondering was she really here
Is she standing in my room?

No, she’s not
cause she’s gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

When you’re dreaming with a broken heart
The giving up is the hardest part

She takes you in with her crying eyes
then all at once you have to say goodbye
wondering could you stay my love
will you wake up by my side?

No, she can’t
cause she’s gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my, roses in my hands?
Would you get them if I did?

No, you won’t
Cause you’re gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

When you’re dreaming with a broken heart
the waking up is the hardest part.